Feeling Empowered

This past week, I had my weekly therapy session, and I went into it being like I don’t need this. I thought I had nothing to talk about. It’s definitely not the best mindset to enter therapy, but I thought I had a decent week. To my surprise, I actually really needed this session and learned something super valuable.

In therapy we talk a lot about the physical stress and anxiety. I often get asked where I feel it in my body. Most times if I’m really worked up, I feel anxiety in my stomach. I’ve also mentioned before that I feel it in my throat. This time around, this question sparked a new feeling. I felt the most intense weight on my shoulders. It felt like a massive anchor was pulling me down and my chest was in pain which led to difficulty breathing.

In that moment I began to panic, so my therapist asked if she could guide me through a meditation. I was asked to lean back on the chair I was seated in and plant my feet to the ground. I was terrified. I felt the most intense fear to meditate because I didn’t think it would help me in that moment. We had never done this before. She guided me through my body and mind and throughout it I was uncontrollably sobbing. Remember when I said I didn’t think I needed this session because I had nothing to talk about? ?

At the end of the session, I had a feeling of inner peace. I felt light and could comfortably breathe again. Not only that, but for the first time I felt my separate body parts working as a whole. I felt my legs and toes touching the ground beneath me. I felt my arms calmly resting on my side. I felt my neck gently holding my head up. I felt the beauty of my body and all that it does for me every second of the day.

I had a harsh realization that I only pay attention to my body when it’s in pain or something feels off. I automatically go to worst case scenario and rush to make a doctor’s appointment because something feels different. I’m very blessed that every doctor appointment has had the same result: “your blood work is great and you’re healthy.” When my body is feeling different it’s a clue that something is wrong, but it doesn’t mean I have a serious illness or need to go to the ER immediately. Sometimes it’s just a clue that my body needs something. It could be as simple as I need more rest, more physical movement or even just a good cry. Do you recognize your body if you’re not in pain?

I’m feeling empowered to take action on my health. I’m going to start working a little more each day to acknowledge my body and all the good it does for me. Heck, I ran 9 miles yesterday and didn’t even give my body a “good job”. Just because I don’t physically feel anything doesn’t mean my body isn’t working hard to keep me alive. We need to make sure we give our bodies some self-love and thanks for all the remarkable work they do.